Journalist and author Hunter S. Thompson wrote:
“It is not necessary to accept the choices handed down to you by life as you know it. There is more to it than that — no one HAS to do something he doesn’t want to do for the rest of his life. But then again, if that’s what you wind up doing, by all means convince yourself that you HAD to do it. You’ll have lots of company.”
Source: Letter to Hume Logan (April 22, 1958) as featured in Letters of Note
As we move towards the end of the year, it is a perfect time to step back and consider what is working for you and what isn’t? Even though it may not feel like it, we always have the power to choose. For me, choice has been an important theme this year. Several clients have been impacted by layoffs with the choice of what’s next? Other clients have found themselves stuck in situations that aren’t working for them. Each has a choice about what’s next.
If you are facing an important decision, I hope the following may be helpful:
Choice is:
- Taking responsibility. We can’t guarantee any outcome but we can make a decision. The decision won’t be perfect but so long as we take action towards a desired outcome, we get closer.
- Courage. Making a choice isn’t easy, it involves giving up something. That usually involves courage to stay on the path.
- Self-awareness. Recognizing we have a choice is the starting point. This means seeing the world as it is instead of how we think it is.
- Optimism. Our natural tendency is to see the downsides in any decision. Remind yourself there is an equal chance of achieving the upsides.
Choice isn’t:
- Playing the victim. It is so easy to paint ourselves in a corner without a choice. This is powerlessness. If you feel like this, think of the smallest thing you can do and start there.
- Trying to please others. I’ve fallen into this trap many times. It feels good at the time, we get that positive feeling and then wonder why. If this is your tendency, don’t respond immediately. Give yourself some time to think and make a honest response.
- Harboring resentment. We all feel wronged at some time but harboring resentment doesn’t help. It is a variation of playing the victim and when we do this we give away our power to choose.
- Being passive-aggressive. This behavior is all about the unwillingness to share what is on our minds because we are scared of what might happen. Nothing good comes from this. It may feel good in the short term but the people around you will know what is going on and it won’t end well.
As you look towards the coming year, I hope you embrace the power to choose. It will serve you well!