In our always on, demanding world, it can be difficult to find time for friends. There are our families, work priorities and if we are lucky some me time for a hobby. Friends? We’ll find some time for them, it hasn’t been that long since we last chatted, has it? When we finally get around to reconnecting with friends, we have a wonderful experience and commit to talking again much sooner. Does this sound familiar?
We Are Wired For Human Connection
The sad thing is by not making our friends a priority we are missing out. We are wired for human connection. Not the online impersonal social media connections. These are the rich emotional interactions that definitely happen in person and can also occur online during a video call. The social benefit of meeting with friends is obvious, but what about at work? During my busiest years, I didn’t have time to sit down and chat for the sake of it. I had a job to get done. Well, I’ve learned in recent years conversations simply to catch up are incredibly valuable. I never know what will come up but something insightful or helpful almost always does. That is the beauty of these friendly encounters.
So what can we do to get better at (re)connecting with Friends?
Here are five ideas:
- Make it a priority – for example set out an intention to meet with a different friend each month.
- Take the initiative – Be the person that reaches out instead of feeling resentful when nobody else does.
- Set a time – Good intentions aren’t enough. “Let’s meet soon” is like saying how does never work for you? Invite the other person to meet at a given time.
- Make yourself available – even if you are very busy, saying how about meeting in 3 months doesn’t work. Firstly it won’t happen and secondly, what does this say about how you are prioritizing your time?
- Create a meet up – if you really want to get good at connecting, set up a regular friends meeting with a topic of common interest. I like sampling different beers and I’m part of a group who meet at a different brewery each month. It costs nothing but a little time to start a group like this.
I hope at least one of these resonates with you. And please let me know what ideas you have.
Life is more fun with friends!